u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
