its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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