the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
