Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
