I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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