oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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