It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
