Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
