i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
