She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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