Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
