I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize