i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She announced her abortion via fbk
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
