what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize
