Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
