so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
