I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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