So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
