Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
This house was built for laser tag.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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