Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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