Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
