Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
