Where did you get a picture of my penis
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
where are my eyebrows?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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