So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
