you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
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