But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
