I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
