Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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