he thought i was a dude.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
nutella sex= disaster
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
