he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
