it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Come share oat with me in your robe
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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