Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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