Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
