Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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