i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
