apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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