I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
