Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize