she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
