remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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