I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
