there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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