I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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