I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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