Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
She announced her abortion via fbk
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
