Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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