i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
