Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
She needs sedatives and a leash
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize
