Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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