is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Someone signed my nipple.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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