Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
